The Psychology of Solitude (2.0)
“Isolating yourself in your room is not good for your mental health”.
This statement is quite controversial but also quite logical. Most will agree with it but others will disagree. This disagreement stems from a mistake in the statement. The statement should be:
“Isolating yourself in your room for too long is not good for your mental health”.
To better understand this affirmation, let us take the case of Joe. Joe was an inmate at a federal prison. From his psychological evaluation, Joe didn’t have any a priori case of mental illnesses before being placed into solitary confinement. At first, Joe was sent to confinement for days or weeks due to a type of confinement known as disciplinary segregation. Under this type of solitary confinement, inmates are usually confined for breaking the rules, for example, stealing things from another inmate. However, the jailer guarding Joe got pieces of information that Joe might be a member of a gang and he is becoming more and more violent. Joe is yet again sent to solitary confinement. This type of confinement is known as administrative segregation. After some years, Joe is out of solitary confinement but some things are different about him. He is now more agitated, always looking over his shoulder, have insomnia and severe anxiety. This hypothetical example is on par with findings of Crime and Delinquency (2003).
So what happened to Joe? Did too much solitary confinement put a toil on his mind? The main reason for this is the prolonged deprivation of normal human interaction. Human beings are categorised as social creatures. This means that most of us are unfit to endure extreme cases of isolation. The use of solitary confinement and exile are practices related to ancient roots, indicating that people have long understood just how deeply the fear of isolation runs through our veins.
“The fear of finding oneself alone — that is what they suffer from — and so they don’t find themselves at all.” (Andre Gide, The Immoralist)
In the 21st century, our fears of being isolated are caused by extreme cases of confinement but also we fear to be alone for an extended period. This is because as we spend time alone our social persona, this facade that we wear on the outside comes into the light. All the frightening thoughts and negative emotions (the shadow as expressed by Carl Jung or the beast as expressed by Nietzsche) that bulked up throughout the years will come out.
“It is what one takes into solitude that grows there, the beast within included.” (Nietzsche, Thus Spoke Zarathustra)
“To truly know yourself, you got to be alone with yourself .”— H.E
Therefore, spending a huge amount of time by yourself can be very dangerous because solitude can weigh us down and become a curse. Some will tame the ‘beast’ but others who will crumble under it. When solitude is too heavy to bear for someone, they often make the mistake of clinging to others. This might save them from this solitude but it will not have a long-lasting effect. A time will come in their life when this bubble will burst and this ‘beast’ will explode. When this ‘beast’ takes over, it will hurt you and the people around you. Even if someone does manage to avoid this solitude (the subconscious part of themselves) through a type of dependence-driven relationship, this person will not become what they could have been.
The dependence on others forces us to be compliant out of fear of abandonment. Compliance with the other person to keep the ‘beast’ in jail will build up the False Self. The False Self is a term introduced into psychoanalysis by Donald Winnicott in 1960. To not fall into the dependence-driven relationships, we must develop what the 20th-century psychoanalyst Donald Winnicott called “the capacity to be alone”. It is only through your moment of solitude that the true self will be unveiled. However, we are so focused on maintaining and nurturing external relationships that we are oblivious to the benefits of seclusion.
When people have the belief that one’s personality can come out through interpersonal relationships and that these relationships are the sole meaning of life, they are unwittingly adhering to what is called Object Relations Theory. At the end of the spectrum, this theory means that a person’s life has no meaning apart from interpersonal relationships. These assumptions completely overlook the benefits that being alone can bring. Anthony Storr, a psychiatrist, argued in his book Solitude: A Return to the Self that it is through interaction with their work not with others that introverted creators achieve self-realisation.
Benefits of solitude
Freedom is considered to be one of the benefits of solitude. Peer pressures often cause us to make hasty decisions. A remedy to this is to critically analyse the situation and make a decision. This, however, is only possible when we are alone. When the outside noise is silenced, a person can focus on what is important.
“Solitude helps the mind to see itself clearly as in a mirror, and to free itself from the vain endeavor of ambition with all its complexities, fears, and frustrations, which are the outcome of self-centered activities.”- Jiddu Krishnamurti
A person’s creativity can be sparked when not pressurized. Freedom from distractions has the potential to spark creativity. In 1994, psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi found that adolescents who cannot bear to be alone often stop enhancing creative talents. People like Shakespeare and Leonardo da Vinci had no movies, radio, and TV but were very creative because they were able to tap into their creativity through the process of being alone.
Another proven benefit is the development of self. When a person spends time by himself, they may experience changes to their self-concept. This can also help a person to form or discover their identity without any outside distractions. Solitude also provides time for contemplation, growth in personal spirituality, and self-examination. In these situations, loneliness can be avoided as long as the person in solitude knows that they have meaningful relations with others. Besides, solitude allows you to reboot your brain and unwind through meditation. It helps to improve concentration and increase productivity.
It gives mind stability, a constancy which is not to be measured in terms of time. Such clarity is Character. This clarity makes you appreciate humanity more. If we learn in our loneliness, we will have a sharpened sensitivity to humanity. For the total development of the human being solitude as a means of cultivating sensitivity becomes a necessity.
What can we infer from the psychology of Solitude?
It seems that balance is key. Solitude is important for self-reflection but can be deadly to the human mind if exposure to it is prolonged.
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